The showroom idiot

It really happened in Breda, The Netherlands: three people are sitting in an expensive showroom, two men and one woman. The new car, let’s say an above-average model, is being delivered. The two gentlemen, seller and customer, in a smart suit; the lady very stylishly dressed. ‘A cup of coffee, sir, cup of tea, madam?’ ‘Yes, I 'd like that.’ The privately purchased above-average SAAB sedan stands gleaming at some distance in the big showroom. New license number. The car will never become more beautiful than this.     

Impatient looks

Belongings of the brand new owners are already lying in the new car: cards, cap, umbrella, and a box with things that still have to get a spot. The people at the table, which is at least thirty meters removed from the new car, go through all the papers. The brand new owners cast loving and impatient looks at the new car.

New prospects

During the delivery of this car a couple enters on the other side of the showroom. The man clearly is an account manager of some kind or other. His wife follows at an unequal distance behind him. Even though there is enough friendly staff walking around, they don’t make any contact. They don’t ask anything, don’t introduce themselves, don’t go to the counter and steer clear of the exceptionally professional salesmen.

Hands off!

But the ready and waiting new car draws them like a magnet. Mister begins to walk around it and lifts up a windscreen wiper. Bet this looks interesting. His wife follows at a meter’s distance. Mister gets in; opens door, sits down for a moment, opens glove compartment. Hey, things belonging to someone else. Oh, you can put these aside for a while, can’t you? He gets out, walks to the back and opens the boot of the car. Hey, again a box with things. Strange isn’t it, wife, do you understand that? By the way, how do you like it? Wife has learned she better cannot say anything and wisely keeps her mouth shut. Mister gets in again to vigorously convert the perfectly adjusted seat. Wife can take a seat at his right.

Send Off

The brand new owners die a thousand deaths: they won’t make any scratches, will they? And hey, hands off that seat! The salesman doesn’t want to scare off new customers so he keeps silent for the moment. This is too much for the new owner. As soon as the botcher and his wife get out and slam the doors shut a bit too hard, the new owner locks the car from the negotiation table. There, that’ll teach them.

Clouds of smoke

The couple looks at the trio at the table deeply offended and mutters to each other a bit. After that they give the trio another nasty look and stride out of the showroom unanimously angry. A few seconds later a worn out grey lease Laguna comes around the building against the direction of the traffic and stops directly in front of the window at the table. “Look, there you have these angry people” the seller says to his SAAB-buyers. The botcher at the steering wheel honks angrily, raises his fist and waves it tremendously. His wife, bulshitted silly, sits staring fixedly. Oh, him again, you see her think, should I separate from him after all? Too bad, opportunity missed because in a big cloud of smoke the overstrained driver steers the French monster out of the avenue with screaming tires.

Unanimity

 They should do that with him too, the new owner at the table says. The trio laughs heartily. What a crock! They are in complete agreement.    

Sources: www.todio.nl